"When you give up vengeance, make sure you are not giving up on justice. The line between the two is faint, unsteady, and fine...Vengeance is our own pleasure of seeing someone who hurt us getting it back and then some. Justice, on the other hand, is secure when someone pays a fair penalty for wronging another even if the injured person takes no pleasure in the transaction. Vengeance is personal satisfaction. Justice is moral accounting...Human forgiveness does not do away with human justice."
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Is it hard to ask for forgiveness?? I know that I did the same mistakes over and over again...what should I do for there is no alarm signaling me that I am forgetting to text her or call her...It seem that certain things I may tend to forget not absolutely but for I also have my own time to spend with others...It does not mean that I forget the people that matters most but need to allocate some time for other especially friends...this is what connections means especially after some years of not meeting each other...I don' see myself as a person that is very forgiving...but I tend to let things go easily when someone made a mistake to me....when they apologize I let them go and nowadays I don't even care bringing the matter up when in a quarrel...I know what I want from others but if they can't give what we hoped them to even after many times of hoping we build up the tolerance that binds us together...in good or bad situations not only faced by the pair but also each other that we want as much want to help who we love or at least make ourselves available for them with a condition that they share their problems...Another item in comes up...sharing...haih...I am actually tired of typing here...so the bottom line is forgiving for a person unites many things...from there we understand others either we are the one doing the mistake or being hurt from it...humans are imperfect that made us forgive and tolerate espeially our loved ones because they matter...and for everything we do we want to share our life with them especially the good times but we must also share the bad one so that they understand and do not feel thay are being left out in their lives.
Every person has their own desire and passion. What drives them to the top of their game and make them who they are makes us wonder why can't we be like them. It is a wish that even I myself would want to live the life of someone else. Then I thought, why should I since this life is my own and I drive my life the way I see fit I should be happy the way I am. Do I? Just a point to ponder.
I read a lot in the net esp the dirty politics and the ever brilliance of the Former Premier in his blog. But other than that as usual Sciencedirect is the main website and Google the search engine. What a drag. I came across an article when I was recharging for something, it is about being selfless and selfish. Both of this terms define all of us in what we do.
I read the article on this commenting on relationships. It said that when we are committed to a relationship we tend to be selfish towards the person we are with. The article said that this is the main cause of tension in any relationship. Not that being selfish is not acceptable in any relationship, balancing it up with selfless makes the continuum in balance. Being selfless in the other hand simply meant that putting personal interest second compared to others. By making our partner happy by our efforts,sacrifices etc comes first compared to our own satisfaction is a measure of being selfless. Though being all selfless and all selfish is not a good thing since there are pros and cons to both. Getting a balance of both really need a lot of give and take from the relationship. For instance, overly selfish causes tension and leads to fight and a bad situation in the end. While an all out selfless realtionship will make one side felt deceived by the relationship that tends to just make only one side happy without complementing the other. This is just the extracts of what I read.
I admit that getting the best in my own relationship is hard but I try my best to get this balance as well. I just hope where my relationship is going will take me where I want rather than the other way around. Selfless-selfish character also applies for other means in life. Since I am an environmental graduate, burning less fuel (less driving) actually shows that we r being selfless by reducing our own carbon footprint. It is always better to be selfless rather than selfish the way the world is moving right now. That is another story for another time.
I have been keeping things to myself lately...Not that I do not have people around me to help me out only that I feel that it is better for me not to worry other people of my problems except for their own. It is sad to see as time passes it feels that there is a lot of loneliness in my heart right now. I may well have a job that any environmental graduate would want but I just don't have the heart to push the pedal. I may have found the person that I would want to spend my entire life with but it seems the distance is taking its toll. Lastly my country may seem to be rich and prosperous but everyday I see the people around me have to work hard just to make ends meet. Huh...what a sad chapter this time around...I could only try,wish and pray that the spark of being a person that does not now when to quit and quick to learn will kick back in ASAP. I could only hope that when she returns that all off this issues will resolve and finally I pray that my country will again rise to its feet again so that the people living within it will deserve what every human would want in a lifetime...happiness and prosperity.
It have been a while since I came here. Nowadays I am a bit busy with my work. FYI, i just started as a research officer in a gov research institute. I just wish that the post I am in is a permanent but sadly it is a contractual a basis post. As a researcher so surely I have a project or two to carry on. I might be lucky since what I got is actually a hot topic right now through out the world, and guess what, it is on global warming.
The project I am in is looking at carbon sequestration. If you don't know what that is Google it okay. In my part of the project, there are a lot off aspects I will be looking in. But for the time being I am busy collecting water samples and methane gas samples from a peat swamp forest. Why PSF you say???FYI the PSF is a very dynamic ecosystem which supports carbon sequestration in it's environment. PSF is very unique with the normal flooding of soil that makes it swamp but compared to other swamps, PSF water is acidic and tea color. More to that, PSF emits CO2 and CH4, greenhouse gases that comes from the soil that is high in carbon biomass that makes it peat. Peat degrades into soil eventually that comes from plant litter and decomposition happens in 2 ways. It is either aerobic or anaerobic. So what is the difference? As i mentioned CO2 and CH4 is emitted from the soil. During the monsoon season where PSF is flooded with water, CH4 is emitted with much greater concentration to the atmosphere (anaerobic decomposition). Mean while, during the less flooded times causes much higher aerobic decomposing happens and this increases the rate of CO2 emissions to the atmosphere. If you are wondering, CH4 is 23 times more damaging than CO2 in respect to green house effect.
As this matter is being studied by me, Malaysia as a country blessed with PSF needs to protect this space. There have been news that a lot of forest such as this in Malaysia have been opened up for development. It is a sad thing since this type of forest is very rare and can only be found in a country with a clime such as my own. The main culprit for deforestation at this moment can be seen as agriculture and more specific the uprising of lore oil palms. As the race to convert fossil gas to biofuel, 3rd world nations are in a race to make the raw ingredient of this new black gold. Malaysia is also one of them, but previous studies shown that PSF is an environment very good carbon storage. It keep the carbon in its peat rather than being in the form of gases that heats up the world even further. There are also some work being done to promote these countries with PSF not to ruin this environment by givng them initiatives to their effort to protect it. In meaning that the country will gain carbon credit (money) for saving these type of forest.
There is more to say about biofuel that is making havoc to the world today. If you noticed that food is getting much more expensive and such insecurity for the whole world is very worrying and have you guessed the source of this problem yet. In my opinion it is from the race tio produce biofuel. Anyway, I leave it to that then. Hope what I wrote was informative and if there is anything more interesting facts about the environment I'll be sure to add more. Cheers
As the 12th General Elections passed, the results was a surprise to all. As Malaysians showed that they all are fed up with the play acting by their old former leaders by using the power given to them every 5 year term. A lot of people speculate of many aspects of how the former government lost power to 4 other states and did not gain 2/3 majority in parliament, the real aspect was the "rakyat" is now no longer be fooled with. Issues concerning them was not made relevant for too long that they have exhausted of waiting for change.
From the elections the message was clear that the "rakyat" now wants change and hope those that have gained power do not misuse what have been given to them. All what is ask of them is to fulfill the promises made and govern this country not of their own but of the people that made it work. Do not forget that the people below them was there to put them in the lavish offices there are in today. Walk the talk and make no mistake that Malaysia will react again if no improvement of what is hoped for ever comes.
As for myself, I am proud to be in this country now that I realize that in its 50 year of history this tide of change has finally shown up. Realistic and optimistic, good things will come for this country. But to get there all must work their way to what goal or dream they have. The fallen can always rise up again in this country shown by groups losing in their field (Proton, MAS etc) now coming back stronger than ever before. If we don't get carried away of what we have, we will always achieve better things and finally gain those of our wildest dreams.
Kudos to those who wish to change and make an effort to do so. Even if stumble in getting where we want to go, get up and learn from it so that we won't come back hitting the ground on our face again.
about what I think of what I do. That is character!
Theodore Roosevelt
It has been 1 month plus that I had finished my first job as a trainee executive. It is very irritating to still not getting a new job for more than a month ever since getting the post as a full time BUM. I am very fortunate to get a job right after my studies and in my field. But since January, I had tried to get a new job. The search almost ended when the place that I dreamed of working called me that my name has been recommended. I did not understand what that meant at first. Not until I was told that in that situation I was actually 80% certain of the post. The 20% that is still missing is actually the approval from the top boss to give the green light not only to me but also some other few candidates. The news was given to me more than 2 weeks ago. Now it is March and I just can't sit down and wait no more.
I was actually planning to start my new job in March. But still here I am waiting for an offer letter for a post. This month I went to an interview like I did in February for a post as an environmental scientist. The interview went well but a question from the manager interviewing struck me in the head. He just asked me "From the CV and how you answer why are you still do not have a job?". I answer him as I could but in truth I actually got a job but due to my unquestioned loyalty to work in my dream company made me turned down a no 53 company in the FORTUNE 100 listed company. I did not know is this just myself confidence that I know what I will end up to be or just I am a dis fortunate to let all the opportunities coming my way just fly by in my consciousness.
Other than this chance, I did threw out a chance to be a lecturer. This happen when I was working for my old employer. My former lecturer actually called me to ask whether I was interested for a tutorship. There is 2 types as I knew that was given either full time which includes doing your masters for free while earning a government based salary and a part time. It was sad that I got the wrong message across for she was actually offering me the full time. Kinda sad to hear the truth when I was told of what she wanted to offer me 2 weeks later that was eventually too late since a new candidate has taken the chance. Still I believe that was just not I was planned by Him to be in right now.
It is March, on the 29th of February I went for an interview for a gov forest research institute. I was lucky for getting friends that gave me my CV for the post of research officer there. When I went there, I was like always doing alright in the interview. I was a bit sad to hear that the post is contractual basis since they only offer permanent posts for master's holders only. The research will be based on water quality for peat swamp forest. Water I like but needing to go to the wild made me a bit unease for it has been sometime I have not gone nature seeking. But I am prepared for any challenges though. Other than that, there is a climate change project to be taken care off when I am more stable later in the post. That was what they told me off the job scope. Then came the 1st working day off March, and to my surprise this facility actually gave me a job. But due to paper work I have to wait for the 2nd call or the offer letter to be sent to me. Still I am waiting right now.
Though I may call that I am no longer a full time BUM, I am still dissatisfied for not starting work right now. I can just say that I will work to which ever employer that wants me to come to work first since I have two posts waiting with one an 80% secured job and the other post is paper work pending position. My funds is getting pretty low right now indicating that I might even be fasting a lot to survive. But I am sure the cloudy days are going to end soon and as I did the impossible during my studies I know where I will headed and hopefully I can make it in time. I just want to get things prepared before SHE comes back and for now I can just hope and pray for the best.
The world is a dangerous place, not because of those who do evil, but because of those who look on and do nothing - Albert Einstein